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Arien Reed

My Transition

Though I knew I was a boy since the age of four, I was not allowed to have short hair, despite many temper tantrums and attempts to cut it myself. Instead, I was groomed to be a girl men would find desirable. But my gender and sexuality never changed, no matter how good I became at ignoring it. Though I did my best to be an attractive girl, by age 25, after learning that gender and biological sex do not have to align, I realized there was no reason to remain mired in gender roles socially constructed for the benefit of cisgender, heterosexual, White men, and instead began to undo the influence of cisheterosexism on my life. I embraced my true, original identity and began to transition socially at age 25 (experimenting with pronouns), and then began to medically affirm my gender at age 27 after "coming out." After learning to accept, trust, and even love my true self, even when I don't fully understand or like it, I have rediscovered my love of femininity, despite it having been forced on me while also simultaneously undervalued by society. I am a queer man who sometimes feels like being masculine in a punk rock way, and also sometimes feels like being feminine. And that's okay, because being a man doesn't mean I owe anyone masculinity, or even consistency.

Transition Gallery


2 Years on T



1.5 Years on T



1 Year on T



9 Months on T



6 Months on T



5 Months on T



4 Months on T



3 Months on T



2 Months on T



1 Month on T

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